School of Rock 2

If there's one thing that rock establishes, it's that women are no good. In fact, they are the embodiment of evil. As a woman, I can neither confirm nor deny this thesis. I can however, compile a chronological list of songs containing the words devil, evil, and wicked in reference to women in the title.

1. Let's be honest, this theme's got deep roots in the blues. Here's Skip James' "Devil Got My Woman" (1920s/30s).

2. This even caught on with New Zealand's Elvis Presley, Johnny Devlin. "Wicked Wicked Woman" (1958ish).

3. Joe Hex brings us "Wicked Woman" (Mystery Year) complete with about 234987 key changes.

4. This one is a little more R&B and is also the best thing ever. "Wicked Woman" by Lynn Johnson (Mystery year)

5. Hell, even country got in on this. With a Spanish guitar flair. Here's Marty Robbins' "Devil Woman" (1962).

6. PJ Proby brings us a cheesy brass section in "Wicked Woman" (1963).

7. Well this is adorable. "Devil in Her Heart" by the Beatles (1963).

8. A blues-based rock epic, heavy on the organ, you ask? Here's "Evil Woman" by Spooky Tooth (1969).

9. I guess we were going to get to actual Satanists at some point. Here's "Wicked Woman" by Coven (1969).

10. "Evil Woman (Don't Play Your Games With Me)" by Crow (1969) was covered by Black Sabbath the next year, but--as you should know by now--a horn section trumps all.

11. So Ringo Starr has a B-Side called "Devil Woman" (1973). Let's be honest: this is awful. In a Meatloaf sort of way. At least he references Sexy Sadie.

12. The honor of my favorite "Evil Woman" song goes to Electric Light Orchestra (1975). Jeff Lynne writes a catchy song. Even better if you can include a cello.

13. Although Cliff Richard comes pretty close, too. Seriously"Devil Woman" (1976) is perfection.

"She's gonna get you from behind."

14. "Evil Woman" by Nightwing (1982) may or may not have been recorded in a garage. Also, crazy prog organ solo.

15. I draw the line of anything after this. For the most part it includes some magnificent covers. Suffice it to say, Shy's version of Cliff Richard's "Devil Woman" is my favorite.

Evilly yours,

Kelsy