11/13/2012

gchat review of One Direction's "Take Me Home" Yearbook Edition

Listen along. It might make more sense. Maybe. Please excuse the typos and emoticons that didn't show up.

me:  take me home: yearbook edition
WTF
 K-friend:  girl just let the flawlessness wash over you
and discuss every single track with me
 Sent at 5:32 PM on Tuesday
 me:  this gchat may or may not turn into a blog post
okay
 K-friend:  so thrilled
have you turned it on
i want to listen with you
 me:  "live while we're young" still catchy as hell
 K-friend:  LIVE BLOGGING
yes yes it is
 me:  YES
 K-friend:  CRAZY CRAZY CRAZY~~~
 me:  and live while we're young
zayn is so flawless
 K-friend:  it frightens me how much i am in love with him
like i need to get a grip
 me:  hahaha
okay "Kiss You"
woah! up beat
 K-friend:  by the way
kiss you
is going to be the 2nd american single
that little things travesty is a UK single only
GOD BLESS AMERICA
liam's falsetto gives me life on this ho
 me:  so he's of some use in this band, is what you're saying?
 K-friend:  girl liam sang like all the first verses of every song on the other album
he arguably has the 2nd best voice/best voice depending on who you're talking to in the band
king zayn tho
king. zayn.
 me:  hahaha
thanks for giving me some knowledge
 K-friend:  i'm embarrassed by this knowledge
 me:  I think I can only recognize Zayn and Harry's voice, tbh
but maybe Liam now?
 K-friend:  yeah
louis' is pretty distinctive too
it's pretty high and bright
 me:  is he the nasally one?
 K-friend:  he's the one that sang the bridge of this song
hmmm i'll point him out on another song
oh GOD
LITTLE THINGS CAME ON SKIP
are you ready for c'mon c'mon?
 me:  I'm forcing myself to listen to it again
 K-friend:  GIRL
well
 me:  god
the freckles
 K-friend:  tell me when you are doing c'mon c'mon so i can press play
 me:  crinkles!?
ugggggggggggggggggggggggggggh
 K-friend:  LOL
i will say
zayn and liam's harmonies
on this song
are to die for
 me:  if these girls they're singing  about are 16, I'm going to...yell in feminist rage?
also
yes
they're harmonies are lovely
 K-friend:  dimples in backs
i'm done.
i'm waiting for you to get to c'mon c'mon
 me:  dimples in backs? isn't that just everyone's back?
just
ugh
just because you made it acoustic doesn't mean it's significant
 K-friend:  could we please write that
in a card
and then send it to ed sheeran?
his entire oeuvre is bullshit like this
and yet 17 year olds think this shit is moving as all get out
 me:  he's like the new Birdie
 K-friend:  he wrote this fucking song
 me:  whose all
if it's slow, it's golden
 K-friend:  I CANNOT WITH BIRDIE
 me:  C'MON C'MON
 K-friend:  YAS
 me:  ooooo, dance partay
 K-friend:  first verse
zaynnn
zayn is such a workhorse on thsi album
louis - singing all those "move a lil closer now"
harry show me what u all about
K I'MMA STOP CUZ I'M SCARING MYSELF
 me:  I love this
I can still do that with BSB and n'sync, tbh
okay
 K-friend:  2nd verse niall
 me:  I'm getting to know their voices~~~
 K-friend:  lol you areeeee
<3
 me:  so niall is just breathy?
 K-friend:  or :(:)
yep
he's not the best singer at all
though
on they don't know about us
he has this sexy ass whisper part
where i'm juts like
oh.
OH.
 me:  who sings when the beat drops?
 K-friend:  zayn
being a goddamn king
 me:  of course
it was good
 K-friend:  are we last first kissing?
cuz that first verse is liam
 me:  yes
okay
 K-friend:  bridge is prince harry
you can hear louis really loudly in the chorus
over most of the other guys
 me:  okay
I could deffo tell that was prince harry
he's so ~scratchy
also
this song is so 14 year old journal
 K-friend:  the 2nd verse is niall adn then louis
 me:  did taylor swift ghost write it?
 K-friend:  then zayn bridging it and giving me the vapors
of course
but there's not enough playing the victim
so probably not taylor
god i can't wait for you to hear change your mind
that is some taylor swift bullshit
 me:  hahahaha
 K-friend:  although liam's falsetto is bless
 me:  this is kind of BSB-ish
like, BSB filler with modern "ooo"s
 K-friend:  lol yesss
OMFG thsi next song is HILARIOUS
 me:  heart attack
da fuq?
 K-friend:  OWWW
 me:  advertisement
oops!
I was all
why are they screamo?
 K-friend:  lol
LOL
 me:  phew
haha
this song is adorbs
 K-friend:  OWWW~
 me:  can't even lie
yes
it's all about the OW!
 K-friend:  i live for this jam i won't lie
but the bridge is so cute
~tryna be okay~~~
tryna be all right~~~
 me:  LOL
YOO-HOO
 K-friend:  lmfao
seein u with him
just don't feel rite.
i just
 me:  your spelling, boo
 K-friend:  why am i so enamored with this shit like i'm 15?
 me:  your spelling
 K-friend:  they make me spell like i'm in an AOL chatroom i swear
summa 09
 me:  we will rock youuuuuuuuuuuuu
oh wait
rock me
 K-friend:  harry and louis kill this song
they sound so good on it together
 me:  ooo, pretty bridge
 K-friend:  YES
louis!!!!
and i think he's usually talentless
but look at him growing up
zayn does like nothing on this song except for the runs at the end
 me:  who sings verse 2?
liam?
 K-friend:  yes ma'am
 me:  YAYAYAYAY
 K-friend:  YOU DID IT!
 me:  and louis has the lead on the bridge
boom boom CLAP
 K-friend:  i love this song
so goddamn much
 me:  this is unadulterated fun
 K-friend:  thank you.
 me:  I love pop music
 K-friend:  R O C K ME AGAIN
saaaaaaaaaaame
 me:  spell if, baby
 K-friend:  F U C K ME ZAYNNNN
 me:  GURL
 K-friend:  MY LIFE, CHOICES IT'S FINE
 me:  "change my mind"
is this niall?
 K-friend:  nah louis
 me:  dammit
yes
king zayn?
 K-friend:  of COURSE
:)
 me:  does niall sing anything?
 K-friend:  idk if on this song
liam's the chorus
with zayn for flawfree harmonies
 me:  "are we friends or are we mo-o-o-re"
just
use those jellyroll pens and write it out
 K-friend:  LOL
with sad faces drawn in the o
let's be real
 me:  truth
 K-friend:  yes zayn i want you to stay for the night
yes
plz change ur mind 4 me
niall there you go!
 me:  this is such a sadsack song
"she's just not that into you, okay???"
 K-friend:  taylor swift type of fuckery in my opinion
 me:  "I would"
 K-friend:  this sassy ass acoustic guitar
i kinda love this song
but the lyrics
are so DUMB
like twilight levels of dumb
 me:  why does harry sound so old right now?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
these lyrics
 K-friend:  his VFs got thick and fat
 me:  and the drums
 K-friend:  (like his dick) idk
 me:  GURL
 K-friend:  LOL
i know
pedobear status
omg the whistles
 me:  this is louis, y/y?
 K-friend:  niall
 me:  oop
 K-friend:  then louis takes the 2nd part of the 2nd verse
 me:  okay
 K-friend:  27 tattoos~~~~~
 me:  I could hear the difference now
that had to throw him a bone, I guess
 K-friend:  lolllll
he's such a nonentity
"would he please u"
 me:  oh
 K-friend:  louis sings the bridge
i mean
OH DAMN HEY HARRY
WITH THIS SEXY ASS LOW SOUND
 me:  heeeeey
I have to say, the basses in choir were always more awesome than the tenors
just sayin'!
 K-friend:  lollll
oh god over again
oh god.
 me:  I have another ad, hold up!
 K-friend:  "said i'd never leave her cuz her hands fit like my tshirt"
oh damn ok
omfg
these lyrics
omfg
 me:  her hands fit like my tshirt?
 K-friend:  i am dying
 me:  oh
acoustic again
 K-friend:  polo
it's ed sheeran
who wrote this shit
AGAIN
 me:  I can tell
this is not significant
 K-friend:  omfg
this is dreadfuckingfull
"i can make your tears fall down like the showers that are british"
NEED THIS ON A PILLOW
 me:  "that are british"
"that are british"
?????????
 K-friend:  i can't breathe
omfg
this is my new favorite song
because this is hysterical
also
 K-friend:  lmfao
right?!?!
 me:  why are they occasionally bone thugs and harmony with these lyrics
?
 K-friend:  OMFG I HEAR THAT TOO
 me:  TOO MANY LYRICS
that are british
 K-friend:  herearesomanywordsrapidfire that are british
 me:  same joke
 K-friend:  omg the last line of that song
 me:  twin brains
 K-friend:  i cannot
love you <3
 me:  "back for you"
is this some pop punk circa 2002?
 K-friend:  definitely an avril lavigne b-side
with strings
sure
 me:  the chorus loses it
but the verses, totally
 K-friend:  yeah the chorus tries to be this epic
weirdness
with string action
 me:  i'm not feeling this
it's reminding me too much of music in middle/high school
which i didn't like
:(
 K-friend:  yeah it's totes filler
but i can tolerate it
 me:  tolerable, yes
 K-friend:  GOD YES THEY DON'T KNOW ABOUT US
I CAN'T WAIT TO HEAR MY HUSBAND ZAYN KILL THIS
 me:  this cheesy ass piano riff is so winning
 K-friend:  THEY DON'T ABOUT THINGS WE DO
god this song is a spiritual experience
 me:  I LOVE YOU
they would just be jealous 'bout us
this is some boy band perfection
 K-friend:  it truly freaking is
UP ALL NIGHT
i see what you did there guys
i see it
 me:  ;) ?
 K-friend:  and also plugging their first album
so ~meta~~~~~
 me:  OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH
I get it now.
 K-friend:  lol <3
zayn
from
2:41
is LIFE
 me:  although this song is >>>>>>>> than that whole album
 K-friend:  YES
 me:  I love that Zayn is the go to riffer
he truly is the JC of the band
maybe even the Brian
AJ?
 K-friend:  OH SHIT GIRL
BRIAN WAS MY MAN
no wonder i'm obsessed.mp3 with zayn
 me:  lol!
does one direction have a Kevin?
they're all too baby to be Kevin
 K-friend:  well liam is supposed to be "daddy direction" because he sorta takes care of them all even though he's not the oldest
why.
do.
i.
know.
this?
 me:  is this from fan fiction?
 K-friend:  no
he says it in interviews
i WISH it was fanfic
 me:  also this chord progression in "summer love" is kind of surprising
 K-friend:  what is this bootleg country twang
in this song
 me:  is there twang?
 K-friend:  the chorus
is definitely giving me
taylor swift's earlier albums
 me:  is it the finger picking?
 K-friend:  this song is terrible
 me:  also
this is terrible
 K-friend:  it's not even good terrible
like SHOWERS
(that are british)
this is just like
um no thx
 me:  "she's not afraid"
thanks, harry
 K-friend:  tight dress~~~~
 Sent at 6:17 PM on Tuesday
 me:  can I confess I'm getting upbeat poppy music overload?
this song is not registering at all
 Sent at 6:19 PM on Tuesday
 K-friend:  yeah
i went to pee during it and now it's over
so that's how i feel about it
these bonus tracks aren't doign it for me
 me:  "kiss you on the mouth"
oh
 K-friend:  there's a reason why they're bonuses i guess
this is the target version of the CD
the regular CD ends at summer love
 me:  "I've been waiting all this time to finally say it"
whatever harry
i don't really care
 K-friend:  lmfao
 me:  just shut up and move on
 K-friend:  this is kinda 80s synthy
and boring as fuck
 me:  hahaha
 K-friend:  i'm a second from skipping
 me:  I'm powring through
zayn is not even saving this drivel
 K-friend:  i know right like
zayn you're trying hon
but
yawn
 me:  this is O-town levels of mediocre
 K-friend:  lmfao shit girl
that is some mediocrity right there
 me:  they were clearly the bottom of the boy band totem pole
slightly above LFO
let's be honest
 K-friend:  idk
even LFO had a hit
did o town ever?
oh wait
IS IT ALL
OR NOTHING AT ALLLLL
 me:  yeppppp
 K-friend:  god i hate myself for remembering that
 me:  hahahahahahaha
and that song was catchier than whatever this is
"nobody compares"
 K-friend:  can harry stop talking about girls in sexy dresses?
i'm good
 me:  hahahaha
so true
 K-friend:  this is slightly less low-budget than
the last 3 songs
but it's still pretty low budget
 me:  I feel like everyone on this song is a skipping record
because they keep repeating phrases
over
and over
 K-friend:  TOTALLY
 me:  like they're lyrics
they just filled in the rest of the verse lines with the same exact lines
 K-friend:  maybe ed sheeran should write more songs
his lyrics are, um,
~new
 me:  at leas they would 'MEET US AT THE CROSSROADS'
"andimgonnamisserrrybahdy"
clearly this pop overload is going to my brain
I also want to point out not one of these songs is over 4:00
so snappy
 K-friend:  i love their attack
just get in, slap a catchy hook and then get the fuck out before people can actually think about what you're singing
it's a great tactic
 me:  it truly is
 K-friend:  re-listening to over again
so i can lol
 me:  I'm still on "Still the One"
 K-friend:  holding the middle of my heart like a polo
HOW.
is this kid
 me:  it's kind of holding my interest
also
 K-friend:  FAMOUS?
 me:  polo
haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
 Sent at 6:29 PM on Tuesday
 me:  wooo
it's over
okay
overall, pretty good album
the bonus songs are bonus for a reason
 K-friend:  hahahah
exactly
 me:  stay away from ed sherenenenen
 K-friend:  stand out tracks?
for me it's kiss you, they don't know about us, rock me, and i would
but i have to give it up for over again because "showers that are british" is just
magic
 me:  so true
I would toss in "heart attack" for adorableness
 K-friend:  oh my god how did i forget about
OW~
 me:  OW!
 K-friend:  how do i find someone young enough
to go to their concert in ----- with me
so i don't look like a damn grandma
 me:  hahahaha



fin.

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