How to survive grad school: Part 1

Grad school is a great/terrible idea. You can learn more about things you like, make yourself more marketable, and most importantly procrastinate joining the real world. But it takes up all your time, causes you to acquire debt because who can afford this crap?, and may or may not be extremely challenging. I'm 98% done with grad school at this point, so I feel qualified to give some pointers on how to survive. So here is PART 1: TURQUOISE JEEP RECORDS.

Mmmmmmmm, Yung Humma.

What it is

If you haven't heard of Turquoise Jeep Records, you may not spend as much time trading YouTube videos with your friends via Gchat or Facebook as I do. Anyway, it's a collective of R&B and rap artists churning out brilliant and sexy hits that you will never hear on the radio because they are too awesome. This is the TJR's own description:

Turquoise Jeep Records was created for the masses. Traveling around the world we have heard so many songs but no one has been able to catch the people's ears like us.

IF YOU AINT DOWN, YOU OUT...KEEP THE JEEP RIDIN'

Really, TJR is a reminder that sleazy and specific R&B is one of the greatest musical genres ever.

How it will help you survive grad school

Instead of procrastinating by staring at the wall, checking Facebook/Twitter every 10 seconds, or wandering to random buildings on campus in the hope that a new location will bring new motivation, watching and rewatching Turquoise Jeep Records videos will bring you so much happiness, you won't care that you'll be failing your midterm the next day. You'll have a Tummiscratch beat stuck in your brain instead.

Highlights

Not all of their songs are great, but these are 6 of the Jeep's best and brightest.

1. "Fried or Fertilized" by Yung Humma featuring Flynt Flossy and Watchyamacallit

This is probably as good a primer as any of TJR's songs. Catchy, low budget music and video production, weirdly specific sexual references. Let's not talk about how many times I've tried to do the moves in this video.

2. "Can He Move It Like This" by Pretty Raheem featuring Flynt Flossy

For the solid colored suits alone, but stick around for Pretty Raheem and Flynt Flossy's dancing duet at the end.

3. "Go Grad My Belt" by Slick Mahoney

The 4 minutes of falsetto, the offensive sexism, the woman's dead eyes, Slick Mahoney's tortoiseshell glasses, and Tummiscratch's brilliant guitar solo really make this a quality song and video.

4. "Cavities" by Flynt Flossy, Pretty Raheem, and Whatchyamacallit

This song encapsulates why TJR is so brilliant: it sounds like a real song. And damn, it's catchy. But maybe try not to sing it public.

5. "Happy Sexgiving" by Yung Humma featuring WhatchyamacallitThe production values have gone up with the most recent song released by the Jeep, but the background special effects are just as amazing.

6. "Lemme Smang It" by Yung Humma featuring Flynt Flossy

This magical duo does it again in my favorite of all of Turquoise Jeep Record's smangers. It has its own dance and everything.

Keep the Jeep ridin'!